It’s no secret that I don’t like the Usa/Seiya pairing. But usually, I keep that to myself, because to some people, this “ship” is their everything. Whether it be because they like Seiya, dislike Mamoru, have experienced a “one-sided crush” before, or if they genuinely feel these two are better suited for each other, that’s their business. And though it annoys me, it’s not my place to tell them what they should and shouldn’t like.
I’m sick of every Seiya/Usa fan taking this line of Seiya’s, and using it as though it’s the sweetest, most loving thing that has ever been uttered. It is probably one of the worst scenes between these two. If I were a Seiya/Usagi fan, I would do my best to down-play that this scene ever happened; not put it on display.
If you’ve never seen StarS, or you just don’t remember the scene, here’s a recap.
At the beginning of StarS, Mamoru left to study abroad. But he never even arrived at his destination; Galaxia, the “big bad” of the season, intercepted the flight and killed him (by stealing his Star Seed). So for the whole season, Usagi has been sending him letters with no response, and calling him only to get his answering machine. She’s been trying to fool herself into thinking that she was OK with it all, but underneath, she’s struggling.
Kou Seiya (a woman taking the form of a man whilst on Earth) met Usagi shortly after Mamoru left, and has since fallen in a deep one-sided love with Usagi. The similarities between Seiya and Mamoru are obvious, and clearly intentional.
In epiode 194, Usagi is attacked by the villain Sailor Tin Nyanko, who has her in a jam. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a red rose startles Nyanko, thrown from a mysterious caped figure.
Obviously, Usagi thinks that it is - somehow - Tuxedo Mask; but it turns out to have been Seiya, who just arrived on the scene. After they both transform and the half-healed Nyanko flees back to Shadow Galactica, it begins to rain.
Usagi: “When I think about it, I’m not very good at “doing my best”…”
[Usagi struggles a little, smiling fakely.]
Usagi: “I mean, like today, when I said, “I’m gonna do my best with my homework!”, I got distracted and then start eating snacks until I got sleepy… and then of course, I fell asleep…”
[Seiya notices that Usagi has her fists clenched, and seems to be shaking.]
Usagi: “Even though, I said, “I’ll do my best on my own!”…”
[Usagi starts to cry loudly.]
Usagi: “… but when I saw that rose… I remembered him!”
Usagi: “Even though I only heard his voice on the answering machine… even without any letters, I said, “I’m okay!”… I thought I could carry on, alone… but… but…”
[She cries harder.]
Usagi: “I just can’t do it just by myself!!”
[Usagi falls onto her knees, sobbing.]
Usagi: “I want to be with you… I want to be with you, Mamo-chan!”
[Seiya watches in shock as Usagi cries hysterically in the rain. After a few seconds, she frowns resolutely, and gets on her knees next to the girl. She puts her hands on Usagi’s shoulders, making her look up, and says…]
What Seiya said was not straight-forward. She didn’t say, “I want to be with you, Usagi”. She didn’t even say “I love you” or anything close.
She said, "Am I not good enough?"
That line. I hate that line. That is the line that gets paraded around by (seemingly) every Seiya/Usa fan as proof of how OMG ROMANTIC~ Seiya is, and how the two are DESTINED TO BE TOGETHER.
But it’s not romantic. At all. I understand that it’s easy to be dazzled by a character you adore, and you only see what you want to see.
But let’s break down what Seiya just did.
She just watched as Usagi confessed to her how much she missed her boyfriend, whom she had no contact with for a long period of time. Usagi broke down in front of her, telling her all her doubts and fears, exposing all of her weaknesses to her. She was beyond lonely, and she was visibly distressed and confused.
So Seiya gets down on her knees, and lays down one of the biggest guilt-trips I’ve ever heard.
"Am I not good enough?"
Are you fucking serious?? Let’s just take the girl who has the emotional fragility of glass, who has a hard time telling anybody a clear “no”, whom you have been borderline forcing into some sort of one-sided “relationship”, and who has just told you how insanely depressed, lonely and miserable they are, and ask them why they don’t love you instead.
That’s awful. It’s emotionally manipulative to the extreme. Which, with fictional characters, is fine! What’s not fine are all the fans who seem to think that this is not only an acceptable question for Seiya to ask her, but a romantic one.
It sends a shiver down my spine to think of how many fans think that would be a healthy and sweet relationship when it’s built on what boils down to emotional bullying.
Find something else to use as “proof”. The times where Seiya angsts over being unable to be close to Usagi, and when she agrees not to see her any more in order to “keep the peace” between the two groups of Sailor Soldiers are heroic, romantic actions. This scene is not.
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